the big sister who was jealous first
a between us guide
the big sister who was jealous first
she was jealous of babies before she even had one of her own to be jealous of.
that's the part nobody tells you. the jealousy doesn't start when the sibling arrives. it starts the first time she watches you hold someone else's baby and clocks, quietly, that your arms can go somewhere she isn't.
she's not being unkind. she's doing maths on love, and at two, the maths only works if it's all hers.
try thisbefore a new sibling, before a friend's baby, name it out loud before she has to feel it alone: "I'm going to hold this baby for a minute. my love for you doesn't get smaller while I do." say it even if she can't repeat it back yet. she's listening.
we're finding 1000 mums who say it before she has to ask. between us, coming. link below if you're one.
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